Man Tragedies: A Thong Blowout

Posted by Blokeman on November 17, 2008 under General Bloke Stuff | Read the First Comment

Blowout Aftermath

Blowout Aftermath

First lets be clear, that in Australia, “Thongs” are no underwear, they are not a “G-String”, no, thongs are in fact footwear, what you would call “Flip-Flops” in other countries, however here, they will remain thongs, an iconic part of your typical Aussie males wardrobe, most guys have their bash around thongs, and their good “Going out thongs”.

Now generally speaking, they are not footwear for the inexperienced, you have a breaking in period with thongs that could last anywhere from a few days to over a week, this period for any type of thong, is characterised by a pain on the edge of your foot from the straps rubbing into your foot as you walk, and often once you have broken in a pair of goof thongs you are unlikely to give them up without a fight, including many a home repair job to fix them. A good pair of broken in thongs, transcend their monetary value and become as much a part of you as say your hair.

One of the greatest tragedies which can befall your much-loved footwear is what is commonly referred to as a “Blowout”. A blowout is when the plug that holds the straps in, and generally it is the toe strap breaks, rendering your thong useless apart from a warped frisbee, or as a float on a crab trap.

This tragedy struck me on Saturday night. There I was drinking with friends in a place where footwear is advisable, due to the various critters that you crunch underfoot on your way to cut one loose in the bush. My good going out thongs, my Havianas (Shameless plug…send us some freebies) were one minute attached to my foot, and seconds later, my world came crashing down, my right thong threw a plug, and there was nothing left to do but pout.

The boys, being the boys they are, consoled me for a short time, before quickly digging into me about buying “Double-pluggers” and the wonderous benefit of never having a blowout, but even these wise words of advise, fell on deaf ears, my world was completely consumed with the pain of my loss, and the thought that my world, at least for a short time will never be the same, and once again I will have to break in a new pair and forever feel like I am betraying my besties.

The pain is so great, I don’t even know how to finish this blog post, my world is all consumed by my loss…..oh woe is me!

Man Tragedies #1

Posted by Blokeman on November 3, 2008 under General Bloke Stuff | Be the First to Comment

Man tragedy number one is brought to you by the weekend just past!

Man Tragedy #1: Leaving a beer in the freezer too long, or forgetting about it

This one really makes me sad, every few weeks, I think to myself at lunchtime on a Friday “I could really down a beer straight after work” and not having any cold at that particular moment, I thrust a couple in the fridge and 1 or 2 in the freezer so they are icy cold, for my after work refreshment.

Then every now and then, one thing leads to another and I get busy at work, then forget to take the coldies out of the freezer, ending up with 2 very ruined and un-salvageable beer.

Wasted Beer (unless being thrown about in celebration at a sporting event) is a tragedy to all red blooded men!