Posted by Blokeman on October 14, 2008 under General Bloke Stuff, Serious Side | 
Not even 24 hours after posting 3 of the most fundemental and basic rules of being a man, have I come across one of the rules, that I thought went without saying, the rule breaking as well is on a scale so large that it has reached international news status.
So heinous is the breaking of the rules I can barely bring myself to publish this.
However this site and rule breaker need to be outed!
What is the rule I hear you ask?
- Rule 4: No man, excepting for on his bucks night, Mad Monday footy team celebrations or for comical appeal, shall wear womens clothing, wearing of womens clothing and attempting to make it Manly is a crime against all who have penis knocking between their thighs. Rule breakers should be shamed and forced to watch movies such as Rocky, Dirty Dozen, The entire collection of Chuck Norris shows and movies and last but not least, should watch at least 24 hours worth of Lesbian Porn, to hopefully drill it out of them.
- Rule 4, Sub-section a: If during the viewing of the Lesbian Porn, the perpetrator of the heinous act again Manliness, utters any line such as “Wow I like her dress” or comments at all upon the lovely actresses clothing, apart from saying “She is wearing too many clothes” the man shall immediately hand in his penis to the nearest surgeon and be forced to become a full time woman, banning them from a spot on the couch during any cricket, football or car racing event.
You have been fairly warned people
Posted by Blokeman on October 13, 2008 under General Bloke Stuff, Serious Side |
Recently during nights out with the boys and in my general day to day discussions, I have noticed that many men are forgetting the basic unwritten laws of being a bloke, and have crossed the boundaries into womens territory, scaring the life out of me and opening up some pretty awkward social occasions. I guess it is up to me to run a refresher course for all of those out there, that may need to get back up to speed with the laws of manhood.
- (and very possibly the most important) Friends, and other men, should not let friends wear speedos, there is no excuse for this rule, anyone caught wearing speedos, must immediately have the light thrust upon then and their sexuality seriously questioned by all men who witnessed the wearing, worse still the friends of said speedo wearing friend, must surely be ostracized until such time as they have proven themselves to be fit for blokish social exposure.
- Men should never discuss with another man, the goings on of any soap or reality television show, unless it is to inform the other man, of an opportunity to see bare breasted women. Any information beyond this, especially when speaking of the lives of the cast of the soap or reality show outside of the show, should be deemed woman’s talk and the breaker of said rule, should be forced to wear womens clothing until they are sufficiently shamed.
- When confronted with the question of whom should drive, no man should, unless they are unable through the drinking of many a beer, disability or other extreme exceptional circumstance, shall allow a woman to drive, especially if there are other males present to take up driving duties.
These are 3 of the most important rules of being a man, however in the coming weeks, I will continue to update you with further rules, and ask you to offer those that I have missed
These are speedos…these are wrong:
These Are Speedos....These are wrong
Posted by Blokeman on November 26, 2007 under Serious Side |
This may be a little bit more serious and soppy than posts that you are generally use to from blokeman.com, but it’s something that has been on my mind for a while.
It seems to m that sentiment appears to be slowly fading in importance to many, now I don’t know if this is due to a decline in the socialist style culture of Australia and a push toward more pure capitalism which we have seen over the past 11 years of the Howard governments rule in Australia. From some of my disjointed ramblings you can probably tell that I am somewhat of a socialist, I am not talking about your extreme socialism, of the communist kind. I am more of a Democratic Socialist, the reason being for this, is that wealth is not of great concern to me, sure at one point it use to be, to an extent, everyone grows up with the ideal of being rich and famous and not having to worry. But what occurred to me as I have grown older, seen more of the world, experienced life as an adult, had my highs and had my lows, is that, no matter the amount of money in your pocket, you will always have worries, concerns and priorities.
So as I have traveled through life and reached the age now of 26, I have been able to figure out what is important to me, and it isn’t the car I drive, the house I live in or the things I own, I know this sounds conceited and Cliché, but it is the truth and something it has taken me a long time to realise.
You see these days, what is important to me means so much more, and it is something that how much I earn can not change, and if it does, then the things I lose as an effect of having less money just are not worth having anyway. As corny as it sounds these days what I enjoy is quality time with my girlfriend, family, dog and friends. I enjoy the simpler things, like playing soccer with mates, surfing and just relaxing. Somewhere over the past 11 odd years we have lost this ideal, the ideal that Australia use to be great for and we all started chasing that extra buck, that bigger car and that big house. We should very much be ashamed about this in my view, and i am glad that I have started to realise the importance of the above simple pleasures.
What this lengthy waste of disk space is really leading to is the loss of sentiment, over the past few years I have noticed that not only have people stopped adding sentimental value to activities and to the small pleasures around them and their families. More and more people say I am too sentimental, but I fail to see the problem with this.
You know what, I think I more just wanted to wax lyrical about a socialist society……
