The world is my Urinal: Queensland style

Posted by Blokeman on August 12, 2011 under General Bloke Stuff | Be the First to Comment

When I grew up I was taught from a young age, that being male came with the benefits, one of those is that the world is my urinal. I remember as a young fella, being at the beach, park or wherever with the family and needing some relief. Upon informing my parents, I would always be told to just “go over there” and this was not something unique to me or my family. Even to this day it isn’t a rare site to see a kid standing proudly and peeing in the bushes, I guess the only difference is that, nowadays I am old enough to know better, and be fined for public urination.

As I grew older I tended to become as you would expect, somewhat wiser, and as you would expect, I learned the ability to control my bladder better, and hold out for a suitable location to relieve myself.

However, 4 years ago I moved to Queensland, Australia, and in doing so have come to realise, that either Queenslanders are not taught to use toilets, or they truly believe in the saying “The world is my Urinal”.
My first introduction to this was at a BBQ of some people we had only recently met and, obviously after a number of beers, I needed to use the bathroom, being the surprisingly polite person that I am, I asked the host, where their bathroom was.

“Mate just go anywhere over there” he replied, with a sweeping movement of his arm indicating some 200+ Square metres of land in which to urinate.
“nah seriously man, I am not going to piss in your yard” I replied
“Poof” he said, as he proceeded to walk over to his fence and just start pissing on it…….

When in Rome I figure, and found my own fence paling to paint yellow.

However I could never quite shake the feeling that I was doing something wrong, at every party and opportunity I still prefer to use the toilet rather than someones yard.

What strikes me as amusing though is that at my last house some of my Queensland friends would walk past the toilet to go piss in yard. I mean seriously, why walk past, and further than the toilet to piss, or worst still was another friend, who at times would piss, just outside the toilet window in the garden……crazy man.

I guess, it’s better than pissing in the spare bedroom….but that’s another story altogether……